How To Save A Life
by Broken Eros
Summary: Robbie Shapiro, finally has the love he's always wanted. Dating Cat is everything he could have hoped for, right?#ZenRadeContest


I still remember the day that Catarina Valentine agreed to be my girlfriend. I had tried for months to impress her, without success. Every attempt larger than the last, each time I put more of my heart in her hands, and each time she rejected me. Only paying the barest bit of attention when another woman me any mind.

My love life's salvation came in the form of an unexpected ally, Jade West. It was Jade who finally spoke up on my behalf telling Cat "she could and has done worse than me." That perhaps Cat should give me a shot. Cat had been hesitant at first, but she had finally relented. Our first few dates had been awkward even by my standards. Cat had been distant and nearly unresponsive to every joke, and every attempt to start a conversation.

Yet she had agreed to a second date, then a third. Over time she had begun to relax and we had fun. Dating Cat was everything I had hoped it could be and more. I reveled in her every bit of attention and strived to let her know just how much I liked her. When began to grow closer day by day, being there for each-other for the good and the bad.

I was there for her when her brother finally got arrested, his antics earning him four years in prison. I spent months with Cat crying on my shoulder over the loss of her brother. She was there for me when I finally gave up Rex, donating him to charity in the hopes he could brighten some kids life the way he had brightened mine.

Finally after months of dating and general couple behavior I asked Cat to be my girlfriend. I had expected her to reject me once more. To come up with another excuse about why it wouldn't work. I was shocked when she agreed, even more so when she pressed her lips to mine in excitement. It was around this time that I began to hang out with Jade.

It was odd that we'd been friends for years, spending so much time in each-others company, yet we knew next to nothing about each other. Somewhere down the line that neither of us could identify, Jade had become my best friend. Her sarcastic humor, her biting wit, and the general love of chaos reminded me of Rex. The difference being that Jade could be nice in her own little way, of course she'd deny it if ever asked. Being extra mean later to compensate.

Those were some of the best times of my life, spending time with my beautiful girlfriend and my unexpected best friend. I learned to live life without Rex, learned to express myself to people. I changed if only slightly but people noticed. Now I wasn't uncomfortable being around Beck and André, and while I still didn't make girls swoon like they did I could garner attention of my own when I wanted.

Then things began to change, Cat became moody and distant in private. In public, she was still her usual bubbly loving self, but when no one was around she began to go back to her old ways. Her moods would swing with rapid severity sometimes to the point where she became violent. I wasn't as weak as I had been, but I wasn't going to win any Mister Universe contests anytime soon. It was odd getting beaten up by my girlfriend who was a hundred pounds after a big meal, but she always apologized later peppering me with kisses and sweet nothings.

That wasn't so bad, but she began to miss dates with no real explanation. Leaving me stood up more times than I could count. The few times I confronted her about it she'd apologized, and promise she'd make it up to me. I had begun to get frustrated and in desperation and fear asked Jade if she thought Cat was cheating on me. Jade had stared at me like she'd thought I'd grown a second head. When I explained my reasons Jade had been furious, she had been intent on confronting Cat but had promised when I begged her not to, though she was clearly unhappy about doing so.

Things had continued growing steadily worse, with me wondering if perhaps Cat was unhappy with me until one day during the holiday vacation I confronted her and asked her if she was happy with me. She had been shocked and said that, of course, she was. She asked me if I was unhappy with her which I quickly told her I wasn't. We'd gone out and had a wonderful night simply enjoying each others company and, I'd thought that was the end of it.

Then I had caught her kissing some guy in the 'Black-Box Theater' when no one was around. I had immediately confronted her about it. She had laughed and told me she was simply rehearsing for a play, it was simply a stage kiss. She had given me a kiss on the cheek and told me not to get so jealous. I had told her I understood, but Jade had caught up with me a few hours later for our usual jam session. Which was little more than me playing guitar while Jade sang. I had been too angry to do it, and it hadn't taken much for Jade to get the story out of me. I had told her I was simply going home. Jade had given me a hug and sent me on my way, making me promise to check in with her later. I had agreed.

I had gone home and immediately fallen asleep, I awoke to the doorbell and opened the door to a beyond pissed of Cat. She had ranted and raved about Jade tearing her a new one about how she was treating me. She accused me of telling Jade lies trying to turn them against each other. I was honestly floored that Cat thought so little of me.

When I told her so, Cat had launched herself at me, slamming her fists against every inch of flesh she could reach. I had been afraid of hurting her in trying to protect myself, so I had simply taken every blow. She had calmed down after a few minutes and had been horrified to discover she had blackened one of my eyes and broken my nose. She had been a stream of apologies and had spent the night taking care of me. It had been the first time in our year-long relationship that Cat and I had slept together. I had stayed home from school the next day, not wanting to deal with any questions about what had happened to my face.

Cat had gone to school with promises of returning that night, making my favorite dinner and another round in bed. I spent the day sleeping, waking up only long enough to ice my face. I had woken up to the doorbell and had opened the door expecting Cat, but I was only slightly surprised to see Jade. Jade wasn't the type to simply text me about my absence, knowing her she'd shown up assuming I was sick and had come over to make sure I had food, and I was resting. Jade was a closet nurturer that way, given the chance she'd make up some excuse about wanting away from her parents or needing a place to sit in peace for a while. She had taken one look at my face, however, and had brushed past me storming into my house, in pure rage.

She had sat on my couch, without a word her expression demanding an explanation. I had simply made her a cup of coffee, knowing that dealing with an angry Jade without caffeine was nearly a death sentence, and I had already been the recipient of one woman's wrath. Jade had taken the coffee without a word sipping it until it was gone, staring at me intently as she waited for an answer. When she had been there for nearly an hour with no words exchanged between us she took a deep breath and let it out between clenched teeth before she had asked me as calmly as she could manage what had happened to my face. I had stared at her for a long moment before I told her that I fell.

Jade had snapped at that, she had pinned me to the couch, straddling me to keep me from moving as she screamed at me. Demanding the truth, promising me that whoever had done this would pay for it. I had stuck to my story, and while Jade clearly didn't believe me she had finally let it go, and had spent hours tending to me, battling between her desire to see to my well being and wanting to throttle me fro not telling her what she wanted to know. When she'd finally gone home, with demands that I stay home tomorrow and that she would probably be skipping to hang out with me tomorrow I had readily agreed. Knowing Jade's compromise for what it was, she was pissed I wouldn't tell her what happened, but she'd let it go providing she was in charge of my recovery.

Cat never showed. When I had gotten onto 'The Slap' to check what had been up with everyone while I was gone, I'd seen a picture of Cat in the arms of the guy she had been 'rehearsing' with. They had been smiling happily at each other nearly nose to nose. The sight made my stomach churn, I spent hours staring at the photo filled with a desire to scream, to call Cat and demand an explanation, and a deep hatred of myself for falling for Cat's obvious lies, that I had swallowed her excuses without question, for my desperation not to loose her that even now I was terrified of saying something, of pushing her away, of losing the first love I'd ever had. It was hours before I finally shut off my computer screen, feeling weary to the bone. I had climbed into bed wanting nothing more than to sleep, but the picture kept flashing through my mind, scenarios of Cat and the mystery boy laughing at me, kissing and cuddling.

Was that where she had been when she kept standing me up? Was Catarina Valentine the cheating type? Was there another man? Was I the other man all along? Was she even serious enough about us for there to be another man? Had she slept with him?

The thoughts had kept churning through my head, the brief periods of sleep I managed were punctuated with dreams of Cat in his arms. Moaning for him, laughing at the idea of me waiting for her. A million dark thoughts crossed my mind until in desperation I got out off my bed and made the trek into my parents bedroom. Searching through medications they hadn't had time to pack or throw away before they'd taken my sister with them to stay with my grandmother. Her health had been declining, and she needed almost constant care. My parents hadn't had the money to hire a full-time housekeeper, and didn't have the heart to place her in a home. So they'd move in with her, hoping that being surrounded by family would improve her health. They'd left me the house, leaving me in essence living by myself. I hadn't had any desire to claim the master bedroom for myself, so I kept everything as they had left it.

Not even bothering with lights I opened my mothers medicine cabinet. As a nurse, I was sure she'd have something to help me sleep. I'd found a half empty bottle of sleeping pills, and without thinking took two. I'd gone back to bed, but still sleep eluded me. After what felt like another hour I had gotten up and taken two more, I idly wondered what would happen if I overdosed. Would I ever wake up again? Would I even want to ? Would it really be so bad to fall asleep and not wake up? No more lying, no more rejection, no more pain. Just sleeping, falling asleep one last time and never waking again.

These were the thoughts that flashed through my head as I swallowed the last few pills and laid down. I closed my eyes and felt my heartbeat slow. I could feel my heart laboring to pump blood through my body. Every breath was harder than the last. I took one last deep breath and then unconsciousness claimed me.

~~~~~

Normally waking up for me, is something of a bittersweet moment. As my dreams fade away into fuzzy memories. I'm left with the comforting warmth of my covers and the possibility that comes with my dreams still lingers within me.

My eyes slowly drift open, and I stare up at the ceiling trying to kick-start my brain into coherent thought. My first thought for the day was a rather jarring one as I realized that I was awake. That prompted a series of further worrying thought's at the implications that my consciousness brought.

It was then that I realized that the ceiling I was staring up at, though familiar, wasn't mine. The smell of antiseptic was thick in the air. Burning my nose with the scent of sterilization.

"Morning sunshine" a voice spoke from beside me, the words tonelessly delivered still made my stomach churn as I recognized the voice.

I rolled over to stare into the partially snarling face of Jade West. I groaned as I rolled back to stare up at the ceiling feeling a headache begin to build behind my eyes. I was alive, I wasn't sure how, but I was alive. I had a sinking feeling of what had happened, and if I hadn't wished I was dead before, I was about to really regret waking up.

"What, not happy to see me?" Jade spat, she was furious, I could practically feel her glare digging into my side.

"Of course I am, I love waking up to my sarcastic best friend glaring me into submission" I drawled. It was the kind of thing that would normally make jade hit me, though lately it was nowhere near as hard as it used to be, and sometimes I could swear she was almost smiling when she did it, and not the usual 'I'm smiling because I get to be violent/vicious' smile, but genuine warmth. Now however I was simply banking on her desire to see me well to counterbalance her usually violent nature.

" I should hit you, you know that right?" Jade growled as if in answer to my thoughts, she flexed her fingers clenching and un-clenching them in potent fury.

"Just make sure that I don't wake up" I drawled feeling my brain sink deeper into it's medical induced stupor. Jade rushed out of her chair and I closed my eyes waiting for the inevitable pain. Instead, I felt arms wrap around me, halfway hauling me from the hospital bed. I opened my eyes to stare down at the top of Jade's head, her face buried in my chest.

"You idiot, you curly haired idiot, why the hell would you do something like this? You scared the shit out of me" Jade snarled, tightening her hold around me with every other barb. I sighed and placed a hand on the back of her head, trying to comfort her as best I could. Jade had was beyond pissed for her to curse, and I had done this to her. I felt a knot of guilt tangle my insides as I brushed a hand through her long black hair. Idly noting the way my hands trembled unsteadily with every movement.

" I'm tired Jade, I'm tired of trying, I'm tired failing, I guess I just wanted it to be over" I grunted as Jade's hold on me doubled, she pulled back and I was struck by the mascara running down her cheeks, her eyes were red and puffy. It was only then that I noticed the water staining my gown. Jade West, had cried, she had sobbed her heart out without so much as a hitch in her voice.

"What about what I want Shapiro? What about Tori? About Andre? About Beck? About Cat? What about us, don't we have some sort of say with you?" Jade was shaking with each word whether from fear or fury I wasn't entirely sure.'

"Cat made her choice Jade" I spat without thinking, Jade stared at me for a moment than quicker than I could have believed possible she struck, my head rocked sideways from the force of the slap, the world momentarily bluing as my eyes watered from the blow before I managed to force myself back to neutrality. I glared at Jade, and she glared back.

"That's what this is about? You kill yourself over her? Because she's too stupid to realize what she's doing.", Jade hissed. I shook my head, collapsing back into the bed, I suddenly wanted nothing more than to fade back into unconsciousness.

"She was just the last straw, Jade. What's a life without love? Is it really worth living?" I sighed closing my eyes. I could feel Jade glaring at me, but I was simply too tired to keep up the argument. I heard the soft clunk of her shoes as she began to leave. I shook my head, I head chased away someone else, but Jade just didn't understand. There was a soft click as the lights went out. I wanted to laugh, Jade had walked out on me and she'd taken the light with her. I let out a sound halfway between a sob and a laugh when I felt the press of something against my lips. I briefly wondered if Jade had decided to kill me herself when the pressure lessened, and I realized that whatever was pressing against my lips was soft and warm, almost as if...

My eyes snapped open, but I couldn't see anything past the veil of Jade's jet black locks. A hand wrapped around the back of my head pulling me close into the yielding warmth that I slowly recognized were Jade's lips. After a long moment of indecision, I wrapped my hand around hers and kissed back. Jade made a pleased sound in the back of her throat, swiping her across my lips, I opened my mouth to give her access, but she pulled back at once. I stared up at her, confusion and elation battling each other in my mind. My heart was racing , and the steady beeping of my heart rate monitor was proof of it. Jade looked at it for a moment a small quirk of her lips her only show of emotion.

"Jade... what was-" I began, my voice hoarse

"You're under observation, the doctors say you won't be released for at least a day or two. They had to pump your stomach, so they want to make sure there aren't any drugs lingering in your system. I told them I'm a friend of the family and your mom convinced them that you overdosed accidentally."

"Where did they get that idea?" I asked, trying to keep up with Jade's words, my every thought was mingled with the taste of Jade's lips.

"From me, I told your mom that you accidentally took to many. I'm not sure if she believed me, she said something about coming to see you once you're released. She wanted me to tell you she's sorry they can't come today, but you're grandmother isn't feeling well, nothing serious just a cold, but they'd rather be on the safe side." I nodded in understanding, I was glad that they were there rather than here, I wasn't sure I could face them right now.

"Your mother and your sister both made me promise to take care of you until you got out of here." Jade said softly, turning back to stare at the heart monitor.

"Jade, you don't have to-" I began again

"I intend to keep that promise" Jade turned back to me, her voice still pitched low, but her words were laced with steel. I knew her well enough to know that arguing with her right now was not a good idea. I simply nodded again, and Jade's eyes softened once more. She reached out a hand to me, and I took it in mine surprised that my hand nearly swallowed hers.

"I've never been so scared Robbie, I came over, and you didn't answer. I had to pick the lock, and when I found you were lying in bed-" Jade paused, and I squeezed her hand in reassurance.

"You were lying there shirtless, your skin was blue, and you were shivering. Holding the empty bottle in your hand. I tried to wake you, but you wouldn't wake up. I keep screaming at you to wake up, wrapping you in blankets to keep you warm, but nothing worked. I called the ambulance and could barely tell them where to go I was so hysterical. They wouldn't even let me ride with you. I couldn't stop crying, I kept thinking how much... less my life would be without you. I begged every god I could think of to keep you alive, I pleaded with everything I had not to lose you.

I'm not sure how I managed to make the drive here, I really don't even remember it. Somewhere between there and here I managed to call your mom. When I got here I told the other nurses who I was, and the told me they were pumping your stomach. I waited for hours before they'd let me see you." Jade chocked off a sob, and I felt the knot in my stomach double. I'd never wanted this, I wanted out, but I never meant to do this to someone who called me her friend. It broke my heart to see Jade in so much pain, and knowing I was the reason only made it worse.

"Jade I-" I tried to speak, but the lump in my throat made it difficult, I'd never thought I'd hurt anyone like this. I never wanted to hurt anyone like this, especially Jade. Jade leaned in and laid her head in the crook of my neck. She was sobbing openly now, and the sound of it was heart breaking.

"Don't ever do that to me again Robbie, I don't know what I would do if I lost you." Jade pleaded, her hands knotting in my thing hospital gown. I tried to make soothing noises as Jade cried into my shoulder. I tried to place myself in her shoes and felt my heart sink as I realized how important Jade had become to me. In little over a year, Jade had become my best friend, and confidant. While I would be sad if anything happened to anyone in our little group if something happened to Jade... I don't know what I would do.

"Don't leave me, please don't leave me" Jade whispered into my shoulder, just loud enough for me to hear. I pulled back to stare into her eyes, feeling my heart swell at the sight of her. She looked like hell, her face devoid of her usual sneer, make up either smudged or washed off, her eyes bloodshot, lips swollen. Yet, I had never seen anyone as beautiful as her right then. I cupped her chin in my trembling fingers and leaned forward pressing my lips to hers in reassurance. The kiss was gentle and hesitant, but some part of me, some wound I hadn't recognized was there took solace in it. We stayed that way for a long moment afraid to move, afraid to break the spell of the moment; finally we separated slowly, neither of us wanting to blink, break eye contact.

"I'm not going anywhere Jade, not ever again." I whispered, Jade sobbed again, but she was smiling this time as she pulled back and wrapped her arms around me. Hugging me so tightly that I thought one of my ribs might break under the stress. I merely grunted and bared it, after all I had put her through it was the least I could do. We stayed like that until visiting hours were over and the nurse came and got Jade.

"This your girlfriend Robbie? She's a keeper, been your side the whole time you were here." The nurse smiled at my flustered expression. Jade simply smirked as she leaned forward and pressed her lips to mine once more, leaving me breathless and my heart rate monitor playing samba music.

"I'm not his girlfriend, yet." Jade smiled at the flustered look on my face as she stood and made to leave, I reached out and caught her hand in my own. I was only vaguely aware of the nurse watching, but this was far more important.\

"Are you serious, do you really? Would you really..." I trailed off unable to get the words out. Jade's expression turned serious for a moment as she turned back to look back at the nurse before she leaned in a placed a kiss on my cheek. Leaning further until her lips were centimeters away from my ear and I could feel the warmth of her breath on my neck, Jade nipped my neck softly laughing when I shivered.

" I don't make out with anyone I wouldn't date, and I certainly don't plan on sleeping with any boy I'm not dating" Jade chuckled. I felt my eyebrows furrow as I tried to process what Jade had just said, when the meaning hit me, I thought the heart rate monitor would explode it began beating so fast. Jade and the nurse laughed at the bone deep blush that came over me after that and with one more kiss Jade stood up.

"Rest up Robbie, you're going to need it" Jade chuckled as she left. Her hips swaying as if certain that I would be watching. Of course, I was, but there was no need to tell her that. I collapsed back onto the pillow, feeling tired and still a bit sick. I still had to deal with Cat, still had to deal with Jade's wrath for this whole thing, and I was sure there would be hell to pay. Not to mention what would happen when my friends and family found about this, but somehow. I felt good about it all, it would all work out.

I could handle it.


End file.
